sarahcentric

The Travel Bug that bit me this summer was a big son of a bitch. Not your average, everyday, “I should sign up for the Travelzoo top 20 discounts email” variety. It was a Superbug from the same lab that developed deer ticks, killer bees, and blue/red spiders whose bites turn nerdy New Yorkers into Spider-man. All day… every day…every minute of the day, I am daydreaming about New Zealand, France, and Vietnam. So many things I want to see and so little time (or money) to see it all.

Lucky for me, there is one trip that doesn’t require millions of dollars and vacation days. Any native Upstate New Yorker worth their weight in apples will tell you that the first Fall weekend in their hometown is pretty much the most important of the year. I just got back into the city last night. Here are some highlights…

The bus ride isn’t 21 hours, only 2. But between negotiating Port Authority and the torturous seats, I swear to God it may as well be. Don’t expect a peaceful ride reading a book. The windy roads make this bus worse than any tummy-tossing roller coaster at Six Flags. You should also be prepared for whatever local you pick up who was divinely designated to make the trip at least 20% worse for you. For example, this weekend’s trip featured the vocal stylings of a rather eccentric man who liked to make up his own songs as he went along and then sing them as loudly as possible. Went a little something like this…

“INDIVIDUAL!!!
(mumble, mumble, whistling, mumble)
INDIVIDUAL!!
(mumble, mumble, humming, whistling, mumble)
INDIVIDUAL!!”

I hope that song is available on iTunes.

Any tour upstate must begin in the driveway. This where I learned to rollerskate, wrote plays with my sister, and broke several garage windows. You also get some local color right off the bat. That tree is autumn raging, and look at our neighbor’s clothesline. There are actual CLOTHES hanging from it.

My little brother Aaron is an excellent guide, even with a mouth full of cereal. (Why do boys love cereal soooo much?) Aaron can spin a crazy yarn about the three most notorious dogs to ever live in our neighborhood. 3) Princess, the Doberman Pinscher who we swear was rabid and would have eaten all of us for dinner if it wasn’t for that fence. 2) Bullet, the white German Shepard at the top of the street who never came after any of us but who was as big as a dinosaur. And number 1, hands down-the dreaded Jocko; a Boxer who Aaron SWEARS to this day cornered him in a backyard.

No Upstate sightseeing would be complete without a trip to one of the orchards. You can get all the pumpkins and raspberries you want. But you better choose that one apple wisely.

My sister and I did not pick this time. We headed straight for the farm market where they sell apples, fudge, mulling spices, homemade peanut butter, pies, sunflowers, mums, and of course…

…DONUTS!! This batch was pretty good, but not the best. The best donuts are at the more commercial orchard down the road. But they don’t have this view.

That tree is on fire!

Seriously…people still hang laundry?!

Growing up with apple orchards and clotheslines is great. But being a grown-up who can hang out at the local winery all day is even better.

Brick oven pizza, hard cider from local apples, fruit and cheese, all while listening to The Cure. The only thing that could have made this day better would have been a Donut pizza. Whatever, they have donut ice cream sandwiches, don’t they?

Here is my sister looking far more stylish than she did the day before. She picked me up from the bus stop in the most amazing Maximum Comfort outfit I have ever seen; pepto-bismol pink yoga pants and a t-shirt as yellow as the sun. It was glorious.

The cider is awesome, the wine is mehhh, but this line-up could only be for one thing…

-HAY RIDE!

All good weekends must come to an end. There’s nothing quite as bittersweet as all of the city apple pickers lining up to leave Shangri-la.

But the ride home is a 1000 times more pleasant. Although a belly full of donuts and apples is a bit much on that winding road.