sarahcentric

I’ve been wearing my Cranky Pants since 7 pm last night. I was hoping they would have worked themselves off by this morning since I wanted to write a big, happy post but no such luck. They are giving me a major emotional wedgie.

No need to worry, though. I’m working through it, repeating inspiring phrases and quotes to myself. Something will eventually ring true for me and I will be as light as a feather again. But right now I’m still in that hissy-fit, “what’s the point, anyway?” stage of Cranky Pants Recovery.

This is from Norman Fischer.
“…Buddhism advises us to be honest with our emotions, and to develop a spacious enough inner life to be able to appreciate fully the whole range of our emotional life and even express it without being harmed by it, or harming others.”

And this is how I am currently responding to Norman Fischer.
“Whatever!! I am freaking out here. Everything is so bad.. Everyone is so annoying…I hate this stupid sweater I’m wearing! I’m sure I need a brain transplant. Why can’t I do anything like a normal person? Oww, my feet hurt, great! I just wanna pull someone’s hair. Maybe I should move to Vermont…”

Shunryu Suzuki Roshi, the very influential zen monk in the picture above, offers this simple mantra.
“Not always so.”

To which I reply…
“No! ALWAYS so! Forever and ever! I am doomed to repeat this terrible, shitty moment over and over again. I can’t believe I’ll be in these yoga pants and hoodie for the rest of my life! WHERE DID I GO WRONG?!”

If there was a line of Buddhist Bratz dolls, they would look just like me.

I’m going to take Suzuki Roshi’s quote out with me on the road today. It’s the most portable. Not just because it’s the easiest to remember, but because it’s the most true in any given situation. Maybe it’s Suzuki Roshi’s version of tough love punishment, zen-style,

“Nah ah, no way! You are grounded, you brat! Sit on your meditation mat and repeat “Not Always So” until you realize it ISN’T always so!”

“Aghhh! FINE!” door slam

“Oh, you better not have just slammed that door, Missy!!!

“Whatever, I hate it here!”

Not always so, not always so, not always so…